I'm back, back in a New York groove (but not according to this asshole)

When I was re-entering the country, the customs agent at Logan airport asked me where I was staying in the US. I told him right now I was on my way to a wedding in Worchester, but that I lived in New York. He said, "You don't live in New York."

Huh?

"You don't live in New York. You study in New York. You don't live there."

Now, I have spent enough time fucking around with immigration matters to know that the word "Resident" is a technical term, but I'm pretty sure I fucking LIVE in New York. Cuz if I don't LIVE in New York, I sure paid a lot of fucking New York rent last year. For someone who doesn't LIVE in New York, I sure know a lot about the 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, L, and R trains. And unless I LIVE in New York, I don't know how you can account for the three hundred dollars I owed in NEW YORK taxes this April, or why I have a standing order at Café Loup, or who is eating all the groceries at [###] Greenwich Street, or what this Duane Reade fob is doing on my keychain. GR!

This is how we do

This is the drive to the lake. That's canola. It's even brighter yellow IRL. Todd thinks it's very "David Lynch."


This is the lake.


This is putting on goofy shit from the closet.


This is a food staple at the lake (to carry you between breakfast, second breakfast, lunch, happy hour, dinner, and roasting european wieners on the fire).


This is cribbage (alt: Nertz).


This is dinner.


This is hitting balls at the spit of land on the far side of the lagoon. "Spitballs," as we call them.


This is distraction from the fireworks and the Perseid meteor shower.

The Cheapest Food in New York

The current issue of New York Magazine is all about "Cheap Eats." To them, this means getting in and out of a restaurant for $25. Pardon my T9, but dual you, New York Magazine. The summer months are lean, at least for my friends and me. I have compiled the following list of hot food for under $2 just for us.

Papaya Dog is my favourite of the hot dog chains. It has hot dogs (even chili dogs!) for under $2, not to mention the cheese fries



Speaking of hot dogs, you can get all kinds of food for under $2 at hot dog carts like beef patties, pretzels, knish, kabobs



Speaking of carts, you can get all kinds of food for under $2 at coffee carts:
coffee and pastries are only 75c
a hard-boiled egg is 50c
a bagel with cream cheese $1.25





For that matter, at pretty much any deli you can get a bagel with cream cheese (I like everything bagels cuz it seems more like a meal) for under $2




One thing that is getting harder to find is a slice for under $2, although a friend from out of town got one for $1 on St. Marks (although he said it was awful)






However, you can get all kinds of food for under $2 in Chinatown: pork buns are 50c, six dumplings are $1 (this means 12 dumplings are $2!), hot and sour soup is $1



In the Financial District, you can get $2 sushi at Bento Nouveau, insofar as all of their sushi is half price after 7pm




Anytime of day, however, you can get $2 falafel at Mamoun's near NYU (and $1 falafel at Cinderella in the East Village)




Hamburgers, cheeseburgers, fries, and onion rings are all under $2 at The Patriot (and the slutty bartenders will buy you shots)




But best of all, worth the train ride, are all the Puerto Rican and Mexican delights in Bushwick. Tacos are $2 at the Tortilleria - lots of meat and pretty filling




And there is an Empanada stand at Knickerbocker and Myrtle - $1




Pupusas (stuffed with beans, cheese, pork, etc.) are mostly under $2 at El Salvador Restaurant



A bit further afield, you can get Russia's/Uzbekistan's/Ukraine's version of meat-stuffed dough from table vendors on Brighton Beach Avenue for only $1.25


Or India's version, back in the city at Washington Square Park: samosas are $1 from the NY Dosa cart

I even made a google map:


View Cheapest Eats in a larger map

Brighton Beach

We went to the beach. The beach is only a subway ride away! This being Brighton Beach, it made me miss the Ukraine. To quote the black guy walking around selling beer, "Peeba peeba peeba! Halodny peeba, folks."

Timmy's!

Timmy's has opened up in New York! (Sorry it couldn't get its act together in time for your visit, Christian and Lindsey.) I have tried to explain to my American friends (note the ingratiating decor) the phenomenon that is Tim Horton's - the double-double, the ice capp, the boring chicken salad sandwich, and so on. When I used to work at the Calgary airport at five in the morning, and I got in line for a cup of coffee at 4:50 am, I couldn't make it to the front in time to start my shift. And there were six locations in the airport alone. Dunkin Donuts sells one billion cups of coffee a year (population of USA: 300 million). Tim Horton's sells 2 billion (population of Canada: 30 million). And so on.

Anyway, it has been reviewed in the Times, the Post, the New York Daily News, etc., all of which give it sort of mediocre, wtf?-type reviews. Hahahahaha, newspapers. THAT'S THE THING.

Francis Bacon at the Met

I can't believe I waited this long to go to the Met. Admission is $20 suggested donation, and they don't give you any attitude if you only hand over $2, although that didn't stop me from hastily adding "I just paid rent with a credit card!"

I could spend every Saturday in the Greek and Roman sculpture garden alone, but there is wing after wing of breathtaking gallery space (I recognize a lot of the sponsors' names - Kravis, Astor - from my work), opulent drawing rooms showcasing 18th century furniture, stone buildings stitched together by sunlit atria. We were there to see the Francis Bacon exhibit, which absolutely floored me (I guess I am finally learning to look at art), but get this uncanny tidbit: he often incorporated the image of the screaming nurse's shattered glasses from Battleship Potemkin into his portraits (it's at the end of this clip, if you're that impatient).

Tw0 Rect0r Street

On Wednesday after I got back, when I left for work in the morning the building across the street was sealed off and swarming with cops. It turns out a woman who worked there had gone missing - she was seen going in for her shift, and never coming back out. For days no one knew where she was, but police were certain she was still inside, because this being the WTC-area, every entrance is covered with closed-circuit cameras. I thought about her a lot over the next few days - how if she was still alive, she must be praying to God that someone would just look harder, look again for her - and I felt like it was somehow my responsibility in particular, as a woman in the neighbourhood, as her neighbour overlooking the place she went missing.

Well, she was found, unfortunately not alive. Then came the CSI trucks, and the media vans, and the street is plastered with Crimestoppers posters, although the police know the murderer is a freight elevator operator who worked in the building.