For $15 you can come too. No you can't.

I'm off to Boston on the Chinatown bus for a society wedding, so you people will have to entertain yourselves for the weekend.

SMS highlight reel, vol. 3

I'm wondering if the recent resignation of Alberto Gonzales was 'politically motivated.'

Girl/boyfriend status has been attained.

Hey professor ive got something for you

I've decided to buy two different colors of the o.g. Jordans and rock ona each same time. I'm so high i can't breathe. That's black nationalism.

I'm looking at Proust but I'm thinking cheese burger.

It must have been your reaction at contracting AIDS from Chris.

[huge fuckin sigh] ok.

Hey. I walked by you on 5th Ave a couple hours ago.

Is it not true that mayonnaise sauces made by women having their period fails.

fuck. Im on first class all the way to spain. Booze and strippers.

I'd love to but can't today. If You're looking for something to do, I hear the cake man is throwing a block party all day.

I miss you! youll never believe what happened to me at the airport yesterday. lets just say my vibrator almost didnt make it past the random security check

Just read yr blog!!! Wtf?!?!

Somebody's done for

You know what I don't even like anymore? Academia. I've been at this crap for ten years, and have engaged in all of the activities that are at the pinnacle of the next five - publishing, reading, writing, teaching. I do not enjoy these activities. I resist doing them, in fact. I might enjoy them if nobody knew I was doing them.

What do I like? I don't know. Arguing, I think. And travelling. Powerfully subversive action. Somebody guidance counsel me a job out of that. Also try to include the Sunday Times Crossword Puzzle and ska music.

Misbehavin'

So I left for three weeks, on the day there was a tornado in Brooklyn and the subways flooded out, missing the evacuation of my neighbourhood as the Deutsche Bank asbestosfest on Ground Zero burned up, and returned to find New York finally had its shit back together, with nice mid-20s temperatures and iced coffees what you can't get anywhere in Canada. Booo - only a few days of summer left.

The 2:00 mark...

... the best mark.

Kiehl's

As part of my poncy NewYorkification, I now get my pommade at Kiehl's, whose flagship New York store is in the East Village, and staffed by white-coated salespeople whose official title is probably "grooming scientist" and who take what they do VERY SERIOUSLY. Anyway, on my first visit to this store, my grooming scientist filled my little tote bag with a bunch of samples he hand selected for me even though I was only buying one overpriced pot of hair wax, and yes mom this may be because I clearly don't wear makeup or moisturize or comb my hair (once I have applied the wax).

Dear Kathireyn

I didn't think you were going to come through, but you did.

Yeah, um... Let's see. I will tell you what I did yesterday. I had the quintessential New York white urban middle-class 20-something couples day. I went to Best Buy in Noho so the boy could get some HD external hard drive antenna thing (whatevertf), and then we got an iced coffee and went shopping at UNIQLO (I forget how good I could look if I actually dressed properly, especially now. Taking off my old jeans and putting on the new ones, I lose 20 lbs.) and then we went and got frozen yoghurt - just to keep you up to speed on the New York frozen yoghurt scene, Tasti d-Lite is so over, and Pink Berry is so on, what with the fresh fruit they put on your yoghurt; here is a picture - then we walked home through Soho and Tribeca and I bought pork chops and potatoes and lettuce and walnuts and blue cheese and pears and made dinner.

Yours in breathless anticipation of C's wedding on Saturday,
Marianne